Dwelling

someone once told me "you are harder on the people you love the most". and i've really been thinking about that over the past few days. they told me this almost three weeks ago...and i didn't really dwell on it then. i thought about it a bit and agreed that it was true, but this past week i have really dwelled on it. probably because i had to write a reading assesment test in english (barf) and one topic had something to do with this, and made me think about it. i actually ended up writing a lot about this phrase and i thought it was a pretty good paper. but anyways, back to the topic of me dwelling on this for the past couple days...
"you are harder on the people you love the most"
think about it for a second. think about the people you love the most, the people that you would do anything for. ok, got them pictured in your mind? think about how many times you have spazzed on them or torn them down because of something they've done or said or situations or whatever. maybe it's just me, but i know that i am truly harder on the people i care the most about. and maybe part of it is because we expect more of those people. and maybe we expect them to be able to handle it. probably both. but something that i realized for myself was that i don't want to see these people get hurt. which makes sense, right? if i love someone a lot, i'm not going to want them to hurt. and so i think in an effort to protect them and myself, i am harder on them and what they do because i don't want anyone to get hurt.

hurting people is one of my greatest fears...and yet i seem to do it so unknowingly! ok so maybe i have more on my mind than just that phrase...but i don't have anything else sorted out yet.

yeah i though i was done being confused about this topic, but i guess not. guess i'll be dwelling a bit more and a bit deeper for the next few days.