Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Into the Water...

Nature have you ever thought about...baptism??


yes. i admit it. i just said the "b" word--you know, the one that starts with a b- and ends with an -aptism.

but seriously. have you ever given it a thought?

i know i have. seriously. but i can't make up my mind! i know i want to do some point or the other. i just can't figure out when that time is! a very wise friend of mine once told me that in the Bible, the people were baptized as soon as they believed. and i know that we are commanded to be baptized.

so why do i want to be baptized? (eventually, that is)

well, here are some reasons that have come to my mind (whether they're valid or not):

  1. we are commanded (as said above)
  2. Jesus himself was baptized, and aren't we supposed to follow him and use his life as an example?
  3. i want to take that step of faith, to solidify my relationship with God just that much more.
  4. there is a tug in my heart that is pulling me towards it.

ya see, the thing is...during every baptismal service over the past year and a bit, i have gotten quite emotional. whether i know the person or not. but these testimonies, and sometimes even just the fact that they are brave enough to get up there and do it, or even sometimes just because i am so proud of them (even when i don't know them!) brings tears to my eyes. and i can feel this tug in myself. and i always thought well maybe it's just the devil trying to trick me. and i ignored it.

but it's pretty hard to ignore something that happens like 10 times at least.

so i've really been going over and over it in my head. and here are the reasons i don't want to do it:

  1. i don't want to get up and talk in front of all those people!
  2. they'll find out how bad i was!! (not that i really was exactly...)
  3. i don't have an interesting enough testimony (i never seriously rebelled! heck, i've never even been to those wild high school parties!)
  4. i'm just plain scared.

so i guess my question do you really know when the time is right?

but if you want to know something wierd...i have part of my testimony written. for when i do go through with this (even if that's in 5 years or more!). i was thinking about it one night...and the perfect testimony popped into my head. unfortunately i only got part of it down on paper before it left me...but it will come again. and i will be ready for it!

but will i ever use what i have written? or will it stay hidden in the notebook forever?

dun dun dun!

how do you really know when?


Lynette said...

if you're feeling that tug on your heart in that direction, it's time to start seriously exploring that. I think there's a pre-baptism "class" that you can take at the church, just to explore it more and ask questions, etc. without committing to doing it. Maybe that would be a good next step for you....

grace said...

heyy katie, i have honestly been thinking about it too and my mom has been talking to me,sometimes it feels like its the right time and others its like oohhh definatly not!

erin said...

i'm commenting. are u happy now?